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Goodbyes…

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Halfway home….a little bit of sun starting to show.

Yesterday was a shitty day. Because, saying goodbye… 😦

I had a weird few days, actually. Let’s start it off on Saturday. Like I mentioned in my previous post, it was my birthday on Saturday, and I would have been alone, had my sons not decided to come visit. So, the first part of the day was in expectation of their arrival.

My boys and daughter in law arrived much later than expected, but it was glorious seeing them! They brought with them some gifts and flowers, and as a lovely surprise, a beautiful birthday cake! We spent the rest of the day together, catching up, chatting, debating, eating, drinking, you know – all the things people do on birthdays when they haven’t seen each other for some time (thank you Covid! 😦 )

The cake…

But as with a lot of situations, at the back of my mind was the knowledge that these few days together had another purpose, aside from my birthday. My youngest actually came down to say goodbye to his brother and I, as he is leaving South Africa for Ireland. At the moment he is not emigrating, but he might decide to do just that while living abroad. Since it is the second of my three children leaving the country, you could maybe imagine how I’m feeling. (Even as I’m writing this, I find it difficult to breathe…) I do, how ever, wish him all the good luck in the world. I hope it is everything he imagines and more. I hope he will be happy, and successful in all his endeavours. With all my heart.

So, the whole visit was bittersweet, from start to end. We did make a few more special memories together, and we did have fun doing it, so please don’t imagine that it was only doom and gloom the whole time! 🙂 But the whole vibe changed perceptibly as the time to say goodbye drew near…

Yesterday, after saying goodbye and on my way home, the weather was atrocious – wild wind blowing, dark clouds, intermittent rain…As I got nearer to my house, there was more sun and less wind – I did somehow feel it was a metaphor for my feelings and the whole situation – things will get better, and I will get over this feeling of despondency…